FIRST GAY EXPERIENCES STORIES
On the lookout for first homosexual experiences tales? In that case, you wouldn’t be alone. In line with scientific analysis, one thing like 7-8% of males who establish as heterosexual has had some sort of similar sex-experience.
Whereas many web sites are likely to eroticize such encounters, few supply first hand, true tales of those homosexual experiences. Given curiosity on this matter, we thought it is likely to be useful to share a few of these with readers.
Beneath is a podcast (E17) that options an e-mail from a listener who identifies as straight however not too long ago discovered himself attracted to a different man at his health club. From The Males’s Self-Assist Podcast.
STRAIGHT MEN SHARE TRUE FIRST GAY EXPERIENCES
What follows are 25 first homosexual experiences tales as instructed by males who establish as straight. To assemble their narratives, we requested the Man Counseling neighborhood to return ahead and share.
First names are used to guard their identities. Our hope is to assist males who’re attempting to return to phrases with their sexuality. Bear in mind, orientation is just not all the time black or white.
Make sure to take our ballot on the finish of this publish.
1. AFTER A FEW DRINKS
“I used to be 21-years previous and spent a lot of the summer season working building to make more money for school. On the job, I obtained to know one of many guys [Mike] who was a bit of older than me. Like 25?
One Friday after work, a bunch of us stopped by a neighborhood watering gap to tie just a few on. On the finish of the evening, Mike invited me again to his place to sit back.
I don’t keep in mind the entire particulars, however we ended up watching a film and firing up some 420. The subsequent factor I knew, we have been taking place on one another.
It solely occurred as soon as, and we by no means talked about it once more.”
-Nick/38 Straight Man
2. MARINE BOOT CAMP
“I’ve all the time been drawn to ladies and by no means had an expertise with one other man – though I had thought of it. However that modified throughout my time in boot camp after becoming a member of the Marines.
There was a man who was about my age (22) who I used to be unusually drawn to. Undecided if it was his construct or what however I simply I simply know that I appreciated him.
Simply earlier than commencement, we ended up hooking up off-base. Undecided how one can clarify the dynamics. Yeah, we had been consuming however we weren’t sloshed. What’s bizarre is that we ended up doing it two extra instances. I’m married now and so is he. We’re nonetheless mates on Fb.”
-Rick/32 Heterosexual Male
3. COLLEGE DORM BUDDIES
“It was just a few days simply earlier than Thanksgiving and everybody had left campus to go house for the vacation, apart from me and two different dudes staying within the dorms.
Feeling bored, the three of us determined to hang around in my room and play poker. One of many two dudes was out on campus. He provided to go down on me and the opposite man as a wager. We thought he was joking however discovered later he wasn’t.
Yep – he made good on his wager.
It was the primary time I had ever skilled one thing with one other man. It was additionally my final however I don’t remorse it.”
-Chris/37 Married Straight Man
4. SCOTCH HOOK UP
“I had a buddy in school who was homosexual however within the closet. One evening we have been consuming scotch at his place and he confessed he had been crushing on me for a very long time.
One factor led to a different and we ended up making out. Later, we traded some oral motion. Solely occurred as soon as as a result of it obtained bizarre afterward. Undecided why.”
-Dennis/39 Identifies as straight
5. CAMPING IN WISCONSIN
“Once I was 25-years previous, I took my little brothers on a tenting journey to the Northern woods of Wisconsin. We had been making the trek from Chicago for years however after our dad handed away, we determined to maintain the custom going.
Whereas we have been staying at a state campground, one of many park rangers got here by our tenting space to warn us of pending extreme climate. I believe the man was round 30 years previous?
We began speaking and I obtained the sense he was fascinated by me. I’ve by no means been drawn to different males, however there was simply one thing about him that I appreciated. Onerous to clarify. Possibly it was his cologne?
Simply earlier than we left, he stopped by our camp and mentioned he’d be visiting Chicago the following weekend. Once I gave him my quantity, I knew precisely what I used to be doing.
Positive sufficient, when he arrived on the town, he referred to as. I ended up going to his resort and we ended up getting it on. Nothing severe. He went down on me and I tried doing the identical however wasn’t excellent at it.
After that occurred, I by no means heard from him once more. Does this imply I’m homosexual? I don’t suppose so. I believe labels do extra hurt than good.”
-Ken/34 Says he’s straight
6. BUILDING SECURITY GUARDS
“I’m a constructing safety guard on the East Coast. Two years in the past, one other man who was my age was placed on the night-shift. While you work that shift, it’s very quiet. To move time, we made small discuss and gossiped about individuals within the constructing.
One weekend round 2 or 3 within the morning, we have been tremendous bored and began speaking about our hookup experiences. I don’t know what occurred, but it surely will need to have gotten us each horned.
We ended swapping head in a utility room. It occurred just a few extra instances that summer season – to the purpose the place all considered one of us must do is say ‘utility room’ and the opposite man knew what time it was.
When summer season was over, he obtained transferred to a different constructing. Not going to say I didn’t get pleasure from it and I do know he appreciated it too.”
-Pedro/32 Married with children
7. ONE YEAR PRISON STINT
“Once I was 25-years previous, I used to be sentenced to jail for 5 years on a drug-related cost. Ultimately, I solely ended up spending a yr in jail.
Throughout that point, I connected a number of instances with just a few of the inmates. It occurs greater than individuals suppose and never as a result of straight guys are pressured into it.
In my case it was mutual. To me, I used to be merely getting my wants met – identical to the opposite guys doing time. Do labels actually apply when you’re doing time?”
-Enrique/38 Straight man
8. DAIRY CASE AT GROCERY STORE
“The summer season after graduating highschool, I took a job at a job at my native grocery retailer within the dairy division. You already know, like stocking milk, cheese, and eggs. The work sucked and didn’t pay all that nice, however I wanted the money for books.
There was one other man (Sam) who labored within the Deli that was round my age that appeared cool. Every now and then, we’d run into one another and discuss sports activities and the way the Packers have been going to make it to Tremendous Bowl.
One weekend I used to be alone within the dairy case, unloading expired milk from behind the casing and ready for the truck to ship the brand new stuff. That’s when Sam got here to make small discuss.
I don’t keep in mind the entire particulars, however I do know in some unspecified time in the future I noticed him popping wooden below his work khakis. All I can inform you is that I used to be impressed.
We ended up j-rking collectively within the meat freezer. The entire thing was over in lower than 10-minutes (if that). After that, we did extra stuff however not within the retailer.”
-Trevor/41 Largely hetero
9. FOOTBALL TEAM
“Once I was in school, I performed soccer. Not that I used to be something to speak about as a result of I largely sat on the bench. However there was a first-string dude that I used to be buddies with the place issues used to occur.
It was by no means like we deliberate it or something. Typically he’d move by room [dorm] and say hi there. One time, he confirmed as much as shoot the $hit – you realize, like to hang around.
I keep in mind telling him my shoulder was tousled from a nasty play and he provided to therapeutic massage it to loosen up the muscle. That’s once I felt his stiffy in opposition to me via his sweats.
After that, the remainder is historical past. We ended up messing round. Over the course of a yr, it occurred just a few instances. The dude is married now and so am I. To me, it doesn’t imply you’re homosexual in the event you experiment.”
-Ronnie/39 Dwelling straight life
10. STEAM ROOM AT GYM
“There was just one time the place I ever obtained it on with one other dude and that occurred at my health club, round 10-years in the past. The reality is, I had all the time wished to know what it was like so not going to lie.
I assume that’s the reason I let this random man do his factor on me. Yeah, it was cool. Undecided I’d do it once more however at the very least I can say I had a primary homosexual expertise.”
-Mitch/36 Straight dude
11. FIRST GAY EXPERIENCE CABBY
“I used to drive a Checker cab in Chicago again within the early 2000’s, once I was in my 20’s. Everybody knew the cash was good in Boystown so a lot of the cabbies tried to seize fares on weekends by the bars.
One time, I picked up a experience by a man who wished a carry downtown. On the best way, he pulled out a leather-based pockets and provided me me $300.00 to look at me j-rk. Once I instructed him no, he upped it to $350, I instructed him I used to be down.
Quickest cash I ever made. Don’t remorse it both.”
-Ricky/40-One thing Straight man
12. GIRLFRIEND’S BROTHER
“Once I was again in highschool, I dated this woman from my neighborhood. She had a brother who was the identical age as me and we grew to become mates.
One time whereas we have been hanging out, he shared with me that he was bi. He requested me if I had ever been with one other man and I instructed him the reality – by no means.
Don’t ask me why however we began playing around. I assume there was part of me that was curious. The bizarre factor is the woman and I by no means messed round – not even as soon as.
I don’t take into account myself homosexual and even bi. Again then, I believe I used to be simply figuring issues out and he was any individual to try this with.”
-Frank/28 Just about straight
13. BELLMAN AT HOTEL
“Once I was 19-years previous, I labored at a resort as a bellman. Continuously, male company had me carry up their baggage.
A minimum of 5 instances, I ended up staying a bit of additional. It was all the time for a giant tip. One of the best half was I didn’t need to do something besides pull my pants down and allow them to do their factor.
If you end up younger and broke, you’ll do something for cash. I’m married now with children and don’t take into account myself homosexual.”
-Nick 33 Says he’s hetero
14. BACKDOOR ACTION TIME
“Again in school, there was a man that I used to get with for oral stuff. At some point, he requested me if I’d ever wish to do extra. At first, I used to be hesitant as a result of it appeared like that will be drawing a line, you realize?
However he was persistent, and I admit I used to be curious. Lengthy story brief, it occurred. I can’t say I didn’t prefer it as a result of I did. However we solely did it just a few instances.”
-Kenny 38 Largely hetero
15. 420 TIME WITH BUDDY
“It occurred just a few instances. A neighbor and I used to get collectively and smoke. Lots of what occurred is fuzzy so I don’t keep in mind all the small print. However I do keep in mind we did issues.”
-Brian/39 Fuzzy straight
16. HOOKUP APP ENCOUNTER
“I went onto a well-liked hookup app to see what I might discover. Undecided the way it occurred however I ended up tapping on a filter that put me in a same-sex class. I finally obtained out of it but it surely was too late, I used to be already listed within the homosexual space.
About an hour into it, a man reached out to me and mentioned he was simply seeking to give oral. As a result of I wasn’t having a lot luck in straightsville, I figured why not. There has all the time been part of me who was curious, so I figured WTF not, you realize?
To maintain it actual, I’ve obtained to say that I loved myself. However as soon as I obtained it out of my system, I’ve actually by no means had any want to do it once more. I assume it’s all a part of rising older.”
-Bruce 33/Decidedly straight
17. FIRE DEPARTMENT PROBIE
“Once I was a probie [probation) with the Fire Department, there was another guy assigned to our firehouse, going through the ranks with me.
Both of us became pretty tight, which is what you would expect given how F-ing awful they treat you. We used to hang out a lot and I guess we bonded.
I’m not going to go so far as to say we were boyfriends because we weren’t. But when we weren’t at work, we did make out a few times and more. I was bumped when he got transferred a year after making it through probation.”
-Mark/36 Totally hetero
18. BASEBALL PRACTICE FIRST GAY EXPERIENCE
“When I was 19, I used to play ball in our neighborhood league. A lot of the guys did because there wasn’t anything else going on in the suburbs.
There was this one guy I used to get with after practice. It just sort of happened. The weird thing is we never talked about it. From time to time, we would end up in my garage when my parents weren’t home and mess around. We were both curious I guess.”
Bobby/33 Straight male
19. FIRST GAY EXPERIENCES WITH COUSIN
“When I was 18-years old, my cousin Nick stopped by our family’s house. We were living in Iowa and he was driving from New Jersey to California for a new job.
He ended up staying in my room during his visit. He was a little older than me but not by much (21?). I remember him undressing and noticing how much bigger he was than me.
He must have caught me eyeing him because he laughed about it. Then, on the next night of his stay, he purposely made sure I saw it again. The rest is history. I was curious and strangely attracted to him. Only happened once and it is not something we’ve ever talked about.”
-Doug/Hetro with a secret
20. WATCHED GUYS IN THE ARMY
“I never really did something with another guy but I did use to watch two dudes I served with [in the military] fiddle within the woods.
They all the time thought they have been being personal, however I’d see them doing issues so much. The truth that I watched tells you one thing.
-Curtis/39 Hetero male
21. NEIGHBOR HOOK UP
“I’m probably not ashamed that I used to hook up with my neighbor from my teen-years. I wager quite a lot of guys have had homosexual experiences and they’re simply too hen to speak about it.”
-Kelly/38 Says he straight
22. MOVIE THEATER BREAK
“A number of years in the past, I went to a film with a few buddies and midway via the movie, wanted to make use of the lads’s room. That’s once I noticed a man touching himself in a urinal subsequent to me.
It’s laborious for me to clarify but it surely actually turned me on, so I joined him. Briefly, we each reached out and touched each other. If it lasted greater than 15 seconds I’d be stunned. That’s the closest I’ve ever come to one thing with one other dude. I believe that qualifies as my first homosexual expertise. Will it ever occur once more?”
-Ryan/35 Clinging to straight
23. BOARDING SCHOOL GAY HOOKUP
“Throughout my highschool years, I went to a army boarding faculty. The setup was three guys to a dorm. I grew to become mates with one of many guys I bunked with named Dale.
On some random fall weekend, it was simply me and Dale in our room whereas the opposite roommate went again house on depart. That’s when me and Dale began speaking about 69 and what that is likely to be like. One factor led to a different and the following factor I knew we have been truly doing it – in the midst of the ground – of our dorm.
For the rest of the college yr, we connected A LOT in varied locations. Oddly sufficient, we stayed in contact after commencement and nonetheless discuss to at the present time. However we by no means talk about our senior yr in class. Is that how bromances work?”
-Nathan/29 Now married with two children
24. CURIOUS WORKOUT NEIGHBOR
“I will need to have been all of 21-years previous once I had my first homosexual expertise. There was a neighbor dude I used to carry weights with in his storage. He had a type of Joe Weider flat benches, which again then was sort of a giant deal.
Over the course of time, we obtained nearer and nearer. At some point he reached out and touched me and I didn’t cease him. It didn’t take lengthy earlier than we each began doing issues to 1 one other on that bench. We in all probability connected half a dozen instances.
The entire thing ended once I joined the Military and obtained deployed. He has lengthy since moved some other place along with his household. Enjoyable instances. However that was years in the past. I’ve by no means accomplished something like that since.”
-Eric/31 Male Heterosexual
25. MUSCLE CAR ENCOUNTER
“Once I was 30-years previous, I purchased a 1968 Ford Thunderbird. Muscle automobiles have all the time been my factor, and this was my dream automotive. However this automobile wanted quite a lot of work, so I used to contract with a mechanic who specialised in older fashions.
The dude was round my age and we used to speak so much about automobiles, sports activities, and the same old stuff that guys do. It’s a part of the explanation we grew to become quick mates.
One weekend, after performing some work on my automotive, we took it out for a check drive. All I can inform you is that whereas we have been on the street, we pulled off right into a truck cease. That’s once we swapped head within the car parking zone.
I doubt he would establish as homosexual as a result of he was married with a bit of child on the time. I’m fairly certain we have been each simply tremendous curious. Solely occurred as soon as. I nonetheless know the dude.”
-Vincent 37/Straight and residing by bro-code
FIRST GAY EXPERIENCES HAPPEN MORE THAN YOU THINK
In studying the numerous first homosexual experiences tales shared on this web page, it is very important keep in mind that in some unspecified time in the future, most males who establish as straight have had some sort of homosexual expertise. I’m mentioning this as a result of many individuals cling to labels that don’t all the time precisely symbolize an individual’s fact.
If you’re a straight man studying this piece, you in all probability can keep in mind some sort of similar intercourse expertise you had with one other man over the course of your life. The query is – would you ever discuss it? If not, why? Are you afraid that somebody would possibly suppose you’re homosexual?
Meals for thought.
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References
Twenge, J.M., Sherman, R.A. & Wells, B.E. Arch Intercourse Behav (2016) 45: 1713. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10508-016-0769-4
