VanMoof bicycles have all the time made information.
In 2011, then-general supervisor Jasmijn Rijcken alleged that an NYPD officer stopped her on the Brooklyn Bridge for biking in a skirt:
On the time lots of people thought this was a publicity stunt–me included–although looking back I form of really feel unhealthy about that since possibly the NYPD officer was hitting on her and one ought to by no means underestimate how sleazy males might be. Nonetheless, I nonetheless blame VanMoof, who had very a lot been utilizing intercourse to promote bicycles, and who previous to that had despatched me this e-mail, which nonetheless provides me the douche chills:
Right here’s the video, by the way in which:
So I don’t know what to consider, besides that Willemeike and that NYPD officer ought to most likely hit it off.
Then in 2016 VanMoof debuted their “Good Bike.” They have been definitely among the many first firms to include all kinds of digital expertise into their bikes, and I used to be definitely among the many first to level out that this was silly:
Subsequent, in 2021, VanMoof introduced the “Hyperbike:”
Unsurprisingly, ‘roided-out e-bikes did completely nothing to exchange vehicles, however they’re doing a incredible job of destroying the bike lane community–even in Amsterdam, apparently:
All of that is to say that I’m not precisely damaged up over VanMoof’s current chapter, and whereas I hate to say I informed you so…nicely, for those who purchased one in every of this stuff and now remorse it, sorry, however I informed you so:
I imply look, it sucks to spend numerous cash on a elaborate e-bike after which must journey 90 miles to see a “Bike Physician:”
However there’s a technique to keep away from that, and it’s NOT BUYING A BICYCLE THAT RUNS ON FUCKING BATTERIES.
It’s a automotive alternative till something goes mistaken with it, then it’s a street journey.
Hey, I’ve stated it earlier than, however it bears repeating: The bicycle is probably the most environment friendly type of transport ever devised by humankind, and it makes about as a lot sense to complicate it with batteries and electronics because it does to make a “sensible broom:”
And sure, after all you should buy a sensible broom:
It’s 2024 and also you now want an battery-powered broom and an tutorial video to only sweep a couple of bits of paper up off the ground:
Now that’s progress.
As for me, all my bike are dumb, not sensible, and that’s the way in which I prefer it:
This weekend I headed out for a 30-mile trip into the “nation” (suburbs), after which straight again into city to run an errand, and I couldn’t have requested for something extra out of this bike, least of all a battery that requires a Bike Physician and an built-in climate alert:
Positive, I’m getting older, and possibly at some point I’ll want that e-assist, however for now if I wish to make life simpler for myself I’ll simply trip a step-thru:
I don’t usually learn the feedback on YouTube movies I’m in, however I couldn’t assist however discover this one:
I don’t know if he’s critical or not, however there are individuals who suppose this fashion, which is ironic as a result of have you ever checked out a mountain bike lately?
Not solely is the highest tube simply as little as any mixte, however it additionally has soft shock absorbers throughout it so you’re feeling as little as doable it doesn’t matter what you’re using, and even a seat that goes up and down so that you don’t damage your widdwe pee-pee.
However, you recognize, one way or the other it is a MAN’S BIKE, as a result of it’s for SHREDDING and SENDING IT or one thing, regardless that each of these verbs sound like they need to apply to stuff you’d purchase at Staples.
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